Holiday Spirit?

I find myself waffling between happy holiday spirit and the bah humbugs. And why?

I remember truly liking the holidays. When I was a kid, Thanksgiving and Christmas were so much fun. And then my parents divorced. Though I don't think it was just then that the holidays became so 'meh' for me. I think it was some years later. When I started feeling like I couldn't be everywhere I wanted to be, or was wanted to be. When I suddenly had 3 or 4 different places I could be for each holiday. And I couldn't be at them all. I started feeling guilty. And it slowly has worked its way into me wanting to skip the whole Christmas thing all together.

I want to make the holidays special again. I want to enjoy them. And I want Tristan to like them just as much as I used to. I just read this great post that my old college roommate wrote. Finally, it seems like I might have found the answer. Heck with guilt. Heck with angst. I'm going to make the holidays about being happy. I'm going to make a calendar of things to do. Everything will be something happy.

And if it doesn't work this year, I'll try again next. And it will work. For Tristan, it will work.